Life in Keaton Beach: Happiness and Sunsets

     I'm finally becoming comfortable with being happy. I'm happy despite not having all the things I was conditioned to believe would make me happy--solid marriage to a high-earning professional, good-paying career of my own, membership in a Christian faith-based religion, close relationships with my children, big house, solid retirement fund. I have been afraid my happiness balloon would pop and I would realize I am a total failure and the letdown would be drastic. Now I realize I am doing a good job discovering the things that make me happy.  
     I never attained any of the things I was told would make me happy, despite a lifetime of striving, so I thought that was the reason for my unhappiness. I wonder how many women did achieve the things we were conditioned to believe would be the key to happiness, only to find they were unhappy? I wonder how you teach a child to figure out what will make her happy without conditioning her to accept your values?       
     Monday I put it into the Universe that I needed groceries, propane and repairs to the roof of the Goose. The propane arrived Tuesday, finally, after 10 days of requesting delivery. Wednesday park owner Lynn asked if I would like to go to the little grocery store five miles down the road. Not much selection, but enough that I can avoid packing up and driving to Perry. That afternoon I saw a man walking on the top of a fifth wheel. His name is Brette and he works for Bill, the owner of the RV. He was putting a coat of sealant on the fifth wheel. He ended up repairing the roof, putting two coats of sealant on it and replacing the bathroom and roof vents.
     I finished reading Defy Gravity by Caroline Myss. It left me with a lot to think about, which is the mark of a good book for me. One of the things she said is that living in the past is like living in a cemetery consulting corpses. I love imagery like that. When I start ruminating on my past, I tell myself aloud, “Get out of the graveyard.” I’m reading Wishes Fulfilled: Mastering the Art of Manifesting by Wayne Dyer. I’m now very aware of my “I am” statements, and I stopped watching late night television, since slipping into sleep downloads the conscious mind into the subconscious. .      
     The weather has been fabulous and it’s spring break, so Keaton Beach is a little more lively. Lynn took her grandson Talan and Gracie and me down to the beach in the golf cart and Talan and Gracie cavorted in the waves (what “No Dogs on Beach” sign?) . After sniffing a golf cart in which the marina mascot, Crockett, had been riding, Gracie got over her fear.
     Gracie had never been comfortable around large dogs, but since the pitbull attack, she has a major meltdown when she even sees a large dog. I think it’s because the dog attack came out of nowhere. Getting her over this may be a challenge. It’s like PTSD.    
     The marina is a quaint little store with a wrap around porch from which we sip coffee and watch a giant winch lower boats into the canal. They stock a few supplies and, of course, I have taken it as my personal mission to support the local economy as I travel, so I had to buy a “Salt Life” t-shirt. And I have had to have several take out dinners from the Keaton Beach Hot Dog Stand and Restaurant to support the local economy.   
     We leave here Tuesday for Cedar Key where I have reservations for a month. It’s 60 miles to the WalMart in Chiefland for a major stock-up trip and 30 miles from the WalMart to Cedar Key. I treated us to a water-front site, since the cost of the park is quite reasonable.
     Every evening we go out to the deck with whatever campers are in residence and watch the sunset over the water. The beauty of the Gulf never fails to amaze me.